Today is National Tooth Fairy Day, a day where we can be reminded to take good care of our teeth, and in the event we’re young and some fall out, to put them under our pillows for magic money. I once heard that the source of this magic money is from some sort of self-described guardian, but I’ve never actually met him or her.

tooth fairy curve

When I was born, assuming the Tooth Fairy visited me at all, I’d get 50 cents. These days, those 50 cents are worth a dollar—but I feel like kids get more than a dollar per tooth. One of my coworkers was mentioning to me that the Tooth Fairy gave his daughter $2 per tooth, and since anecdotes are reliably scientific, this means some of us (namely me) deserve more magic money.

$.50 1987 in 2013

Wolfram|Alpha has a nonzero amount of information that you can compute regarding your teeth, which, since I’ve had several visits to the dentist recently, is rather meaningful to me. Brush your teeth, boys and girls. That’s something I really cannot stress enough to you.

permanent right mandibular third molar

when does the permanent left lower canine erupt?

Unfortunately, as the evidence below shows, the Tooth Fairy is not nearly—in my view—as popular as she should be.

wikipedia popularity for tooth fairy, santa claus, easter bunny

Even though there is the option to toggle a linear scale version of the graph, the reality is that doing so will almost entirely omit any of the Tooth Fairy’s representation.

If every adult tooth were an adult person—a proposition I find endearing, because I love calcification—then the USA would have approximately a lot of people.

number of teeth in an adult human multiplied by usa's adult population

Importantly, I have discovered where the Tooth Fairy lives. It’s rather fitting that she would live on a mountain, or if not that, a small town nearby it.

cities within 5 miles of the tooth

So celebrate National Tooth Fairy Day, and take good care of your teeth, lest you too be less popular than Santa Claus despite living on a mountain. If you want to learn more, I humbly suggest that you consult Wolfram|Alpha.

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